Next Choices weekend marriage retreat will be announced shortly.
Questions you may have about Choices Retreats:

• Is this denominational?
• Who should attend?
• What unique needs are you addressing during this retreat?
• Is this just for people with problems?
• Will couples openly share stuff about their sex life?
• Are there discounts?
• I’m a Pastor or Ministry Leader and am concerned whether this is appropriate for our folks?

Our Hosts and Facilitators:

Our facilitators are Carnell and Angela Borden.  They are the owners of Bordenz Enterprises, the operating company for ThePureBed.com.

Angela and Carnell have been married for 16 years.  They have 5 children (3 girls and 2 boys).  Among their children are identical twin girls and a daughter with multiple special needs.  Angela has a Bachelor's degree in Education with a minor concentration in Sociology.  She is a homemaker and active member in their local church.  Carnell is a senior pastor (10 years) active in the ministry for 20 years. 

Carnell and Angela have personally experienced the deficit of resources in the local church to address issues of sexuality from a positive perspectives.  In 2006, they prayerfully began bringing ThePureBed.com online.  The goal was and is to support a scripturally sound message of positive sexuality in marriage to counteract the more common societal perception that marriage kills sex drive.  The site provides encouragement, information and intimacy products for married couples.  Pastor Borden’s electronic booklet, Christian Sex Ethics, has been downloaded by over 7000 visitors in the last 6 months.

The couple counsels hundreds of husbands and wives each year and are committed to demystifying sex in the church and exposing God's heart concerning righteous sexual attitudes and behaviors.

Is this denominational?

Absolutely not.  We believe that Jesus died for a sinful world.  We believe He rose again with power over death, hell and the grave.  We believe He will return to receive back to Himself a regenerate people who’ve received His gift of eternal life through faith in Calvary’s work and lives devoted to His will as revealed in the Bible.  If you believe these things, you’ll feel at home.

Who should attend?

Legally married couples for whom the Bible represents ultimate moral authority are the target for the OIC experience.  While we acknowledge that information concerning Christian sex ethics is profitable for engaged and single Christians, this experience is designed to accommodate the unique needs of Christian married couples.  Couples MUST attend together.

What unique needs are you addressing during this retreat?

CME deals with general relationship issues as they are often precursors and/or barriers to an overall good sex experience in our marriages.  We also facilitate discussions among wives and husbands (separate break-out groups) concerning specific sexual needs and preferences.  This is done using an exercise that getsyour issues on the table without having to identify that as the case with the group.

We deal with common issues that stifle the growth of marital relationships.  We share strategies and information to help couples apply principles of faith in a way that allows them to overcome such issues.

The issues that confront married Christians are many when it comes to sex.

• ð       Is anal sex okay?  What about oral sex and spanking?
• ð       Is it wrong for me or my mate to masturbate with or without the other?
• ð       What if sex just isn’t important to one of us but the other seems to need it more often?  What do we do?
• ð       What priority is sex in our marriage?
• ð       Can we talk dirty to one another while being intimate?
• ð       Can we use sex toys?
• ð       How do I communicate my needs/preferences to my spouse?
• ð       Can we tell one another erotic stories?  …about others?
• ð       What do we do if we are in a sexual rut?  How can we spice things up?
• ð       What can or can’t we do?

All of the preceding questions regarding sex in our marriages spring from the same context.  How can we answer these questions in ways that align with our faith in Christ and Does (How) the Bible address any of these issues?

Our role is to help you identify, frame and address your questions and concerns by showing you how scripture applies to each of them.  It is also to expose you to the completeness and simplicity with which the word speaks to our sexuality.  We want to ensure you that it is normal and appropriate for you to ask the questions you ask.  We also want you to know that the answers can be found by you through accepting that God’s principles are comprehensive and capable of addressing any issue in our lives.

Is this event just for people with problems?

This is for those who want to be introduced to (1) how to make changes in, strengthen and/or enhance their marriage, (2) learn how the Bible speaks to sexuality and answer specific questions about sex in marriage, (3) have there existing understanding of God's will for marriage sharpened or challenged, or (4) who just want this time of affirmation and refreshment.

Will couples openly share stuff about their sex life?

No.  There is no feature, exercise or agenda item on this weekend that calls for you to explicitly speak about your personal sex life.  There will be exercises that allow you to share with your spouse and/or get your questions, topics or issues ‘on the table’ with anonymity.

Are there discounts?

If you are able to get a number of couples to register with you, we can negotiate a discount based on that number.  Call us at (909) 576-9561 for more information.  If you need assistance with payment due to financial hardship, contact us at (909) 576-9561.

I’m a Pastor or Ministry Leader and am concerned whether this is appropriate for our folks?
We assume you are already prayerful.  We encourage you to take an additional step.  Call Pastor Borden and speak with him directly.  Confirm whether your proper sense of caution has a basis or not.  He would love to speak with you and there will be NO sales pitch or pressure to make a choice.